Cute as it may sound, but there is nothing “sweet” about living with your parents when you are well into your adult years.
Indian parenting style is one of a kind. They smother us with love, care, and affection. No one is complaining! I am not, for one. But the process doesn’t really help us in the long run.
We are not prepared to embrace life. But, fear the hardships and shun the low points.
The idea of success and failure is embedded in our minds. So much so that we are entangled in this tug of war not realizing there are no compartments, just one whole package called life.
You get the good, the bad and the ugly from time to time. You need to make peace with this arrangement. But, we are entitled to the extent that we feel it is our right to expect niceties from life.
It doesn’t work out that way, no prizes for guessing!
The thing about living alone is you get to understand yourself and fight for your survival. You don’t get to do that when pampered by your family.
I am not saying that people who live with their folks aren’t responsible beings. Let’s be real about it, we have a sense of security in the back of our minds.
I never understood why living away and apart brings an intense longing for home. I had no idea what it meant to get back to the warmth of home.
It has roughly been 2 months since I have moved into a new flat with my roommates. It isn’t exactly surreal, as I have well settled at my new place.
I always wanted to get out of my house and live on my own. It sounds fun, living on your own, but…
It is CRAZY, LONELY A LOT OF TIMES, TOUGH, A LEARNING EXPERIENCE, AN EYE-OPENER, LASTLY, A FREE COURSE ON HOW TO ACE ADULTING!
Living with parents is precious, but also stifling in many ways. You don’t get to be your own person, you are a son/daughter, you are family. Hence, there are restrictions and perks of being a family. You feel entitled in many ways and lost too. I did too!
Once you start fending for yourself, there is no going back.
If you learn to love your company and enjoy the “alone time” as ME TIME. Well, you, my friend, have officially made yourself immune to the frivolous, “Look at me, my life is so f*#&%$ awesome” facade.
Living alone has its perks.
Learn To Get Your Act together
When Daddy Dearest is around to make sure every demand is met with swift action, you tend to become an entitled prick.
The entitlement then seeps into every aspect of our life, and when the time arrives for us to stand up for ourselves, we are left wondering. What went wrong?!
Keep reminding yourself everything that makes your life easy is not what you deserve, but a privilege.
The hot & fresh food served on the table, the clean bed sheets, the orderly and clean house, the breakfast calls, the constant reminders by your mother to eat and take good care of yourself…all this is a privilege. And, if you refuse to acknowledge it now…
Good luck adulting!
Life is so unfair!
No shit, Sherlock!
So you got a pat on the back because Sharma Ma’am thought you were the best student of the century.
BULL SHIT in CAPS!
Life is still going to screw up things for you. It is not going to go on a steady pace, it might be painfully slow and chaotic at times. There are also going to be those times when a euphoric spike might just add more zing to your dull life.
It keeps changing and the only way to get out of it is by adapting and learning to embrace these changes.
Go for the kill!
We tend to get comfortable with mundane and don’t challenge the status quo. It is easy to complain and don’t get me wrong, I still keep doing that every now and then. Precisely, once or twice in a week!
Complaining about setbacks just kills the whole game. Instead, go with the flow and then challenge the status quo.
Staying alone teaches you to improvise with life.
Had a breakup, discover a hobby you had no idea existed within you.
Going through a life-changing phase, take out time to reflect and comprehend what’s that transition all about.
Simply bored, explore your interests and know what sort of a person you are! There are millions of ways to make life interesting.
Make friends for life
Friendships forged under these circumstances are special.
I really feel sad for the ones who don’t get to experience this sort of a bond.
There is money involved, there is self-respect involved, there are secrets involved and there is friendship at stake too.
Living with your friends is a recipe for disaster. But, what if it works and you make it work?
FRIENDS fam get it. It is an impossible feat to have a beautiful bond and share a comfort level to be yourself with your roomies.
I have seen it, not as easy as it sounds or looks, thanks to the above gif! If you are blessed with it, I would suggest, in fact, insist to cherish and keep it close to your heart. Enjoy, while it lasts.
Learn to be the bigger person
Now, this is tricky, if you end up feeling like the bigger person, that implies you haven’t actually done it right.
Living alone makes you aware of the pettiness we tend to display at the slightest discomfort encountered in our daily lives. Shit happens and small glitches do leave a bad taste in the mouth, not countering this point.
We probably can let go off things, if it doesn’t attack your morals and individuality.
We are talking about real damage done in the form of bullying, instigating, emotional abuse, shaming…if not this, don’t get antsy because the cook didn’t turn up. Or, the Uber didn’t follow your preferred route to reach a said destination.
Learn to let go where you absolutely can.
Fight for yourself!
Here comes my favorite part, be your own ‘Knight in the shining armor’.
I have learned to push back and say NO, where it is unquestionable for me to have a voice.
It is good to be in your Zen mode, not when the world is arm twisting their way to control or manipulate you. Don’t be a fool then! Work your way through it.
Be kind, but don’t be a walkover.
Start managing your monies.
Money is very important, whoever sells you a different ideology is delusional. There’s a catch here though, always question yourself, whether this purchase is a need or a want?
Once you establish this simple difference, rest whatever you do after this point belongs to your personality and is an integral part of a lifestyle you follow. You don’t have to alter it for anybody.
Just be absolutely sure what is a need and what is a want! It is nice to have a good mix of both the needs and wants.
The most important of all is that you learn to value yourself and the people who value you.
Life is too short and unpredictable to stick to a plan or waste it mindlessly. Adulting is the hardest of all. No matter how much you push back, a day would come when you have to grow up.
Doesn’t it make more sense to have fun and embrace the adult life with open arms?